Letting it all out!

This week has not gotten any better, it keeps going down hill faster and faster. I feel like I have hit rock bottom. I feel as if I am doing this all alone. I have great family and friends supporting me, but I feel as if they truly don't understand what I am going through. This is tough, we knew it would be.I just really miss my husband.  Our son is adjusting again with daddy leaving. It breaks my heart that the only emotion he can show for missing his daddy is anger and unfortunately it is directed towards me. Then I start feeling extremely guilty for blaming my husband for this. I did not sign up for  this. Why am I the one who has to deal with this, it's not my fault daddy left. Then I calm down get back in my right mind and remember exactly why I am doing all of this! Because I love my husband and would do anything for him. As a great friend told me there is always sunshine on the other side of every storm. We just have to get through this little storm together as a family! We may be thousands of miles apart but we will do it. I may not have any hair left but we WILL get through it! 
5 more days!! 

Ugh that's all I got

The last couple of days have been pretty rough. Have you ever just felt like you are going no where. Well that's how I feel. Nothing seems to be falling in place like it should. This time with Rob going back has been the worst. I try to keep busy but when that's the only thing you can think of, it's a little impossible to think of any thing else.

Rob got to call Monday night but it was only for a short 45 minutes. To most that may seem like a long call, but when you have not talked to you husband in a week, that time can feel like a second.I had so many questions I wanted to ask him, but I did want to interupt his excitement. He sounded so good on the phone. It amazes me how much he has changed. He went from a man saying I will get it in a minute to a man doing it before you can even get the words out of your mouth. An I absolutely live that! Oh and folds his dirty laundry, who does that? Although I can't complain at least it's in the dirty laundry basket right?

4 days and we will be on our way to South Carolina for Robs graduation! That has been keeping me going for 2 weeks now! I am extremely proud of my husband. He is everything I could ask for and more! He is sacrificing everything to provide better for his family.

Hello World!

I am Jami. I am a mother of 2 very busy little boys (2 and 1). I have been married to my wonderful husband for a short 7 months, but we have been together 6 years.  I am currently a full time student and a stay at home mom. My husband is an EMT and a Volunteer firefighter. In our six years we have went through more things most people our age have never even though about.  

About a year ago my husband came to me telling me he wanted to join the Army. My first reaction was how could you do this to your family? Are you freaking nuts? But after I calmed down and started really looking into it, I found that more than half of Army wives love being an Army wife.  It will be an amazing opportunity for him and I and our two young boys. This is something my husband has always wanted to do but something always come up or got in the way for him to join. I feel as a wife I should not stand in front of his dreams. He has never once told me I could not follow or put down any of my dreams. How could I do that to him?  I am still very nervous that my husband my leave and never return home to me.  How can I explain that to my kids that daddy is never coming home?   It will be extremely hard but our faith and love will get us through the rough parts. We know the risks of joining. But who's not to say something might happen to him in a civilian job career? 

In October he left for Basic Training. The first couple of weeks were extremely hard. We have not been more than 2 days apart from each other.  For 2 weeks I had no communication with my husband. The hardest part of him leaving was my son taking his anger out on me for his daddy leaving. He does not understand why his daddy left. There were many days I just wanted to give up and say the heck with it. It takes a lot to be a way from your husband or any close family for that matter. If  my husband is willing to sacrifice his life for our country than I am willing to give all I have to stand behind him and support him!  I finally started receiving letters 3 weeks in.Which helped a lot. It may seem weird to some, but I read those letters as if he were standing there talking to me. He was able to come home thankfully for Christmas. We got 2 weeks together. That was the best two weeks I could ever have asked for. On Jan 3rd 2011 he had to return back to basic. That was the hardest goodbye yet. Hearing my son asking were daddy is going and not fully understanding what I am telling him broke my heart even more. We are now 1 week from graduation and this week is just dragging on and on. After graduation he will then begin his job training ( AIT ) and that will be for 4 months. He absolutely loves what he is doing  and I am very excited and proud of him! 

~For I am the wife of an American Soldier.